This post is extremely personal, but I'm sharing it in hopes that it may help someone else hear an answer or encouraging word from the Lord.
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There have been a few occasions in my life where I have heard from God very clearly. One of them was September 1999. I was 20 years old and at that time in my life where I had no direction. My closest friend moved a few hours away to pursue a calling from God. This was way before the age of text messaging and easy access to email. I didn't have a girlfriend either. I was recovering from a broken leg I sustained while working at a Christian summer camp. After floating thru two years of junior college, I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I was lonely and lost. I was enrolled at UT-Arlington, but sitting in the classrooms was painful. At the time, I thought that each class (psychology, literature, A & P, whatever it was) represented a career path, and if I didn't absolutely love the class, then I would hate having it as a profession. Not a very good way to look at things, but hey, when you're young, you don't have much perspective.
I basically flaked out. I was coasting along but wasn't attending class regularly. I waited too long to drop the classes without any repercussions, meaning not only could I not get any of my parents' money back, but I could also not erase these classes from my transcript. I contemplated joining the Army (partly because there was a recruitment office next to the donut shop I frequented.)
The one thing I did have was volleyball. I started playing sand volleyball a few years earlier and eventually started playing indoors. I loved it. Obviously I had height on my side, but, on a good day, my vertical was between 33-36 inches. (Yes, I was a big enough loser to test it in an empty gym at Pantego Bible Church by myself.) I was playing just about every night. And, as most vball players know, you can twist your ankles very easily. One Wednesday night, I was playing at UTA (because I could still get in as an "enrolled" student) and came down on someone's foot and rolled my ankle. Then, a few days later on Sunday night, the same thing happened again. No big deal really, it happens when you play volleyball.
Well, later that night, as I laid in bed trying to go to sleep, a thought entered my head, "that wouldn't have happened if I was at church Wed/Sun night." Man, I can still remember it like it was 5 minutes ago... lying in bed, looking up at the goofy glow in the dark stars my younger sister had stuck on the ceiling...God spoke to me.
Get right with God.
You've tried it on your own long enough.
I immediately got up and started digging around looking for my Bible. My mind started filling with all of these options, my friend's brother had been inviting me to church, my church had a wonderful college campus ministry... all of these things started falling into place in just a matter of minutes.
That night, I said, "ok, God, I surrender."
A path was laid out before me. It wasn't clearly marked, it didn't have any street signs, I had NO idea where it would take me, but I knew it was the path to follow.
Within a year, I moved 200 miles away, 6 months later I met the woman I would eventually marry, after a few more years I had graduated college and had a newborn daughter. It certainly wasn't easy, there were plenty of roadblocks, detours, and heartbreaks along the way, but I had a purpose. I had something to follow. I didn't always know what that something specifically was or where it would take me, I just knew to follow God.
Jesus said in Luke 11:9;
“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you."
I didn't have to know the answer, I didn't have to know what I was looking for, I didn't have to know what was on the other side of the door. All I had to do was ask, seek, & knock. All I had to do was want it.
I wasn't in a good place. I wasn't prayed up, or attending church, or reading my Bible daily... nothing like that at all. If anything, it was the furthest I had ever been away from God. You don't have to wait until the perfect time to surrender your life to God. That's not what the Bible teaches.
Click the scripture link and find out what the next few verses say about what happens, about God's love, about what He will give you if you want it.
If you are tired of being alone.
If you are tired of trying it your own way.
The answers most likely won't come over night. If life has given you some deep holes to climb out of, so be it. You didn't get there quickly and you won't always get out quickly. There are people in the body of believers out there who can help. God's word is available to enlighten you. His Holy Spirit can give you the inner strength and peace to keep you heading in the right direction.
12 years later, I'm still on that path and still unsure of where it will lead me. What matters is that I now have a path to follow. A path laid out by someone with my best interest in mind.
It is possible to hear Him. All you have to do is try.
Please, ask Him now and let me know if I can help.
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